I was listening to K Michelle’s “Maybe I Should Call” a couple of days ago while cleaning my house and I began to get a little emotional. Have you ever thought about the should’ve, could’ve and would’ve when it came to a relationship? Do you think that if you would have done things differently maybe your relationship would have a different outcome? Well I think so…
I recently found out that the only man that I was in love with is now engaged. At first I was not shocked because months ago he expressed to me that he was thinking about proposing. Not only that but I really never thought of him as the marrying type. It is not because I think he is a bad guy but I never imagined him settling down so soon. Then I started reminiscing about the good times we had, the moments we shared, the overwhelming emotions that we went through and then my feelings started to come through. I am hurt and feeling like the only thing I have known is now gone. I do not think we would have ever made it to marriage but I do believe that we would have made it far. I am now wondering if I could have expressed more feelings, if I should have let him spend time with my son or the fact that I should have kissed him more, would things be different.
P.S. I know that you read my blog from time to time and if you are reading this know that I really love you and I hope you are truly happy
Video by YouTube
Call me a negative Nancy but I do not think it is possible to have everything that you want in a man. Let’s face it, men are not made like they used to be so I think we women need to accept the fact that we cannot have the moon and the stars.
Not that we should lower our standards but some women should eliminate some of the superficial things that we look for in a companion. I feel that we would be a lot happier and a lot less lonely if we compromise some of those “qualities” that we can do without. Now men on the other hand, they do NOT understand this logic. They are stupid as shit. I come across many unhappy men who are just stuck with a trophy. Eye candy is good until all of the sweetness has gone. They know what is good for them but instead they pick what looks good for them. I think men go after an idea rather than who the woman really is based off her characteristics. Men like the image that a woman may give even if it is only superficial. This is irritating as shit to me because women with substance and that will truly love them for them will get overlooked. This leads me to my next point that these women (the ones with more substance) are targeted and most likely made a side chick because men want their cake and eat it too. They want what is pleasing to the eye and ego but will play around with what is actually good for the soul.
I am still holding onto the fact that I will find my shooting star
The Single B*tch
As women I think we have accepted the fact that we will not find the moons and the stars when looking for a mate. As I have stated before, I think that some of us are single because we do not change certain things about our dating habits in order to get what we want but are there lines drawn to who you can date?
I remember being younger and I would not want to date a friend of someone I used to date or if that guy attempted to pursue one of my friends before, I would not want to date him even if it was yeeaaarrrrrssss ago. Besides dating a close friend’s ex or an ex of a family member, one of my biggest rules is not dating a friend’s bother. How do you all feel about dating your friend’s brother or your friend dating a family member of yours? I am not too sure about dating my friend’s brother simply because I would not want to ruin a friendship. I would rather have a true friend over a boyfriend any day if he is in some way shape or form related to my friend. I would feel like I could not have regular girl talk with her because I would not want to give TMI. I like to tell my friend about all of the good sex that I have but I cannot tell her that her brother is giving me the best dick of my life! It just would not be right….YUCK.
Do you believe it can work? Do you believe it is possible to go through a breakup without your boyfriend’s sister getting involved? Do you even feel like it matters?
Give me your feedback!
The Single B*tch
I am not perfect, I have many flaws and I sometimes make the same mistakes over and over again. In areas such as my career or even being a mother I am usually on the straight and narrow but when it comes to love I just cannot seem to get it right.
I feel that all of my dating situations are similar and at first I thought maybe our timing was off but then I realized it was me. Unfortunately I think I have become so jaded, comfortable and in denial for so long that I no longer see the error in my ways. Firstly it took me forever to realize what exactly it is that I want out of a man. I did not know if I wanted to go with the flow, have a fun buddy or if I wanted a commitment. Now I see that all along I wanted something real, monogamous and all mine. Year after year, man after man and tear after tear I noticed there was a pattern. I continued to let the same things happen over and over again. Deep inside I wanted a committed relationship but I settled for just sex because I thought that it was all he could offer me or that sex was the only result. That same guy would then make another girl his instead of me. I saw then that I was the one making the mistakes. I wasted time on those who could not give me what I wanted or needed.
I learned that you have to be upfront about what you want. You have to set the tone for where you want the situation to go. Now that I know the error in my ways, I will never let another fly under my radar just because I am not secure in what I know that I can offer or what I deserve.
The Single B*tch