How Are Men So Simple But They Give Us Complexes?

We women are so critical of ourselves and it could be because of society’s views of beauty, family, culture, insecurities but I blame men. We want to look good and appealing for ourselves but of course we want to be desired by the men that we love the most. Some of us look in the mirror and think we are too fat, too skinny, too short, too tall, too conservative, too sexual, not curvy enough or even too curvy. Some of us think that our hair is too curly, too straight, skin is too dark or too light. We can even go as far as saying that we battle between being too independent or independent enough. We can all argue that as a woman confidence starts within ourselves but how can we not have a complex or two when our men are constantly tearing us down?

Men say that they want a natural, independent, self-starting, beautiful, modest woman but I feel that they praise the women who are opposite. They say that women with fake hair, lashes, nails, ass and titties are not attractive but they sing the praises of the exact same women. Some of us women are comfortable in our skin and some of us want to improve our bodies but do not have the time or money. Those of us who do not have the money to get a gym membership, eat clean (because it is expensive) or time to even work out result to other alternatives. Those alternatives may be using supportive undergarments or even surgical procedures. Men seem to fall to the feet of women who may be “exotic” and have long, silky flowing hair and light eyes. So women who do not have those physical attributes may add extensions, wear wigs and even wear contacts to make up for what they feel they are lacking. I also feel that because of the contradictory statements of some men they create a lot of competition between women. We cannot be too sexual or love sex because if we do we are called sluts but if we are not sexual enough it is an excuse for us to get cheated on. For those of you who have not seen me I am an African-American woman who is comfortable in my skin but unfortunately some are not. I say that to say this, I get so tired of friction between African-American women because some are of a lighter complexion and some are darker. It does not matter how dark or light your skin is, if you are African-American you still check the same race box on a job application. JUST STOP IT!!!!

I am never the one to bash men because I feel like we have to take responsibility for our own actions but it would be an amazing feeling to get support from the men we adore.  I often wonder when men will help simplify our complexes and embrace us for who we really are.

Sincerely,

The Single B*tch

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